越来越爱这个舞台^!^ ~~

………………………………

MSN7.0有了相应的blog功能，MSN Space；但是，我不喜欢。

理由一，有MSN的人都建My Space，烂！

理由二，只要在你MSN名单里的人，不管你在不在线，随时点击，立即进入。人与人之间就真的没有更大的空间了？MSN Space,不如说成My Sadness: No Space :"(

当然，这取决于个人。没有谁逼你把个人的隐私方上去，有没有自己的空间……看你自己要不要喽~但是，blog对我而言，决不可能是一个让众生都能窥探我内心的窗口，也不是所谓的 “用来update朋友”的联络工具，更不是如现在很多明星那样纷纷出自传的自我标榜。blog对我而言不是自己的广告牌，也不是个人名片。建立这个舞台时间不长，自己的post也是而频密时而稀疏，也没有什么朋友的command回帖。但是这一路走来，我发现这小小的角落已经成为承载我感情微波的透明容器。那些小小的波澜偶尔泛起，虽然是点滴，但他们的跳跃却有与我心跳一致的频率，也只有懂得这个频率的心灵才能真正读到他们。透明的容器，没有遮掩，那些跳动的火花是我全心献给你的音符，用他们凑成暂短的夜曲来抚摸另一个共鸣的心灵，一个依然晶莹透明的灵魂……是期待吗？是等待吗？我想，更多的是依赖。寻找那片灯火阑珊，那种坚持一直撑着我前行的风帆，这里恰恰是那个徘徊留连的心灵歇息的地方。是你吗？是，你？还是……你？

在某一瞬间，就是你。

所以，这里已经有了连接我感情触角的丝线；在奔波中的喜怒哀乐已全然模糊不了我和这片天空的默契。这里不仅仅是一个让我畅所欲言的blog,仿佛更是我手指、头发和呼吸的延伸。这里，是我的一部分，我也是他的一部分。

这儿是晶莹透明的，相比而言，that space is something...materialized, i would say.我越来越爱这个小小的舞台，他了解我，能感受到我，让我有所期待，给我希望，也给我纯净和清新的呼吸。这些一直是滋润我成长的营养，也是我与你分享的真谛，也绝不是在MSN 上随便一点击就能擦出的火花和瞬间带来的震撼。

但生活永远都是实际的，这一方面教会我怎样保护自己，真实面对，一方面也让我更珍惜和爱护这片芳香纯净的世外桃源。他永远不会成为material world的一员；如果有一天我也有了MSN Space,那也只是一个联络工具和辗转生活中的装饰品——像日本料理橱窗里的假菜，对，就是这个感觉。

just a thought....


woo...it has been a long time not to be here...how come? it's my blog lei! how can i just leave it there and only do my own crazy stuff? what have i done in the past..about one month? more than one month?...well, just finished my first final paper this morning, and i'm sort of tired and slacked. after a good nap and a simple but nice dinch cooked by myself, i feel like being here and just be...ME ^!^ yes, the real me ^_*

this semester is massy, crazy and lousy for me, really~~~but life is always like this, new challenges keep popping up and we just LOVE to catch all the excitment and worries that they bring to us. however, sometimes i feel tired and hard to move ahead, especially in the past two or three months. what do we really want? what's the purpose for us to activate our energy and enthusiastic to face the pressure, difficulties and hardtimes? for success? for self satiscaction and self recognition? or for not being lost in this running world, since everyone else is doing the same thing. the answer seems very easy when people mention about $. for more money, of course! but does it mean a better life?

i used to be very confidence about the answer to this money issue, like all the littles girls with dreams and fantacies in mind. "money is good for life, but make sure u won't be a slave for $." well it's easy to say so, but as life goes on, to draw a fine line or connection between "$" and" bettter life" does not seems as easy as i used to think. $, recognition, reputation...they are all about this material world. i used to chase all these, very hard. but now they do not appear that real in my mind.

i'm not sure about how it comes like this, or whether it's right to let myself in this position, or whether i should make some adjustment in my life to make a change or something. whether all these are worth some time to think over... i don't know. being away from home almost a whole year, i'm extreamly tired, both mentally and physically. sometimes i let go myself, as feet my greedy mouth with lots of cakes, cookies, chocolate, such unhealthy stuff. over eating is horrible! and i feel guilty and regreted every time, i don't want to be a fatty piggy ^@^

just hope the finals can be passes smoothly, and everything goes on well to let me be home soon....********